I'll admit, my daughter's feeding tube still kinda grosses me out. Just the changing part of it; something about that "pop" when it gets in place gives me the willies. But you know, as a tubie mom, I deal with it.
Being a tubie mom doesn't mean I like or enjoy all the things that come with being a tubie mom. It means I know that this is what's best for my daughter, and thus I will push through. I will deal with that pop. I will deal with that awful vanilla smell. I will deal with the cases taking up my cupboards. I will deal with the pump and bag malfunctions. I will deal with the spills and the stains. I will deal with the panic when I think I forgot part of the get-up needed to feed her. I will deal with those beeps at midnight when I realize I measured wrong.
The random passer-by might wonder why I deal with it, and how. Because it's my daughter. Because it's what is best for her growth and development. Because she can't eat by mouth. Because she's one smart cookie. Because I would do absolutely anything, no matter how gross it is or uncomfortable it makes me, for her. Because I would die for her.
So before you let yourself get too freaked out by her feeding tube, just take a deep breath. You can deal with it too, like I do. That pop lasts merely a moment; then maybe you can see beyond it and relish the beautiful little girl it helps.
